Build a Little Birdhouse in Our Yard

With the help of his Dad, our young son constructed an aviary in the backyard.  This took a lot of research and preparation -- and several trips to the hardware store!  Yesterday evening, he raided the nest of our resident magpies, bringing down four young birds.

Frankly, despite all the advance preparation, I did not expect that he would actually be able to do it.  I made the hardware trips to be supportive, thinking (hoping?) something would go awry; I am not a pet person, for I believe animals are much more satisfied and successful when they are allowed to care for themselves.  These birds smell awful and they are always hungry.  He loves them.

Whether these helpless creatures live or not, this has already been a revolutionary experience for our son.  He is learning compassion, as he must nurture these nestlings:  they will die if he doesn't.  His sleeping patterns (and location) have been willingly changed; his thoughts go out to what (and when) they will next eat and whether they are warm enough; his awareness of sanitation has been dramatically altered!  He is learning to recognize their nonverbal communication patterns and experiencing the empathy motherhood entails, the more remarkable because his Autistic tendencies make such awareness a challenge in interpersonal situations.

I was moved this morning by one of his concerns:  magpies are clever creatures and can learn to respond to particular behaviors and verbal cues; they can even learn to mimic sounds.  He wondered what he ought to say to these babies when he comes to feed them, so they will learn to trust and expect good things from him -- and it needs to be something appropriate for them to learn to say.  Such concerns echo the worries of a conscientious mother for the development of her children beyond their physical needs.

From specialists who intervene with at-risk children, I have heard of women who do not speak to their children, using the rationale that "they never speak to me!"  He laughed at the silliness of such a thing, asking, "Where are they supposed to learn to talk?"  He already recognizes how essential it is for him to be a good model for his little ones.

He hopes these birds will learn to recognize him as their parent and that, as adults, they will return to him.  I hope he will become a good parent -- now and later.