Shared Success

A few years ago, a successful neighbor described his thoughts on an article in a prominent national newspaper, which highlighted marital struggles that often happen to successful couples after their children get old enough to leave home.  My neighbor described a scenario, wherein the Wife, who had previously remained at home to manage her household and mother her children, considers that she is now "free" to "take her turn" at work.  The problem is that her boardroom Husband is now financially capable and free to travel and enjoy the benefits of success, but his dutiful Wife is now someone else's employee and is unavailable to him.  This creates the ideal setup for Another Woman -- who wants money advantages and travel opportunities -- to pick up an established Husband.  This scenario has left in its wake an army of hardworking, embittered, late-comer Wives in the workforce; women who, ironically enough, had looked forward to the change in dynamic in the first place.

"What the article didn't mention," my neighbor continued excitedly, "is the dirty secret that having a homemaker wife to raise a family is the factor that gets men into the boardroom in the first place!"  He explained that a man's success in business is a team effort, one that generally requires the motivation and stability of full-time wife to achieve.  The whole scenario would not happen, he believed, if a woman recognized that her husband's arrival at the boardroom, and the attendant freedom to travel and to have money was also the wife's own success, earned through her years of full-time, voluntary work for the family's benefit -- and a woman should feel free to choose to stay unencumbered and enjoy success with him.

I have appreciated my husband's willingness to work hard to provide for our family; his expressions of gratitude and support for me personally as his companion at work in our home have encouraged me and helped me to see value in my ministry.  Hearing our neighbor's perceptions did not change my labor, but it helped me to see my contribution to our family's economy with fresh eyes -- and it reminds me to rejoice in each of my husband's triumphs as our successes; to see his opportunities as blessings for us both.


All photos courtesy of sxc.hu.